Has anyone experienced that their spouse is disconnecting from them emotionally and physically since being diagnosed?
My spouse shows a general lack of interest in how I am feeling/coping and doesn’t ask about my annual appt’s with my neurologist - doesn’t enguage in conversation when I tell him that I am having new symptoms.
Is this just they way he is trying to cope by avoiding the whole issue - or is this the reality that I must accept he cannot/does not want to share this burdon with me.
I’ve done the "I need to share my feelings with you" and "I feel like you are not interested in me" stuff.
Any thoughts on this???? Feeling lonely in my marriage.
Hi, Diane. I’m no expert, let me just get that on the table and I’m not married, but I am in a relationship.
My girl is very loving as I’m sure your spouse is. I haven’t been diagnosed just yet and they are continuing with tests, but I’m taking copaxone as a precaution.
One night my girl and I were laying in bed and it was about 1:00 am. I get up at 5:00 and I was having a hard time sleeping after taking my medication. Long story short we started going at it about "nothing", this was about three days after I started the meds and dealing with the fact I might have this disease and I asked her if we could just go to sleep. Now, I was feeling like she was looking for an excuse to leave the relationship, so I laid it all out.
I said to her, "Look, I love you very much and we are both really tired at this point, but I’m sick and I need to get my sleep. This medication is making me feel really weird and I’m learning that I might lose all control of my bodily functions because of a disease I didn’t ask for. So, here is your chance to leave. If you leave right now, I’m going to be cool with it. I don’t need extra stress right now. I need support and if I know I can’t lean on your for that support then you need to go now before I really start. I’m not going to lie to you there will be days when I feel great and there will be days when I don’t want to move, so here is your chance." Luckily, she stayed and the conversation strengthen our relationship and understanding.
I was married once before and my ex and I hit a rough patch in our relationship. I thought our marriage was strong, but she left when times got tough. Left me holding the bag if you will. So, for me it was important to make sure my girl could handle this before I started to really rely on her. I hope this helps you out. Take care and keep positive.
